Interview

Russian military invasion of Ukraine continues. More than half a million children are victims of violent action, and more than one million fled their homes and were forced to move to safer areas. Television, all social media feeds, channels and blogs, all mass media are devoted exclusively to the depiction of destruction, pain and fear.

How to preserve the health of our children in these conditions, their fragile emotional state? We consulted a child psychologist for useful tips the parents can use to help their children.

Parents are always support and source of protection for the child and it’s important to maintain this feeling of security by all means.

“I’m with you, we are protected by the army, I know how to arrange our space as safely as possible.”

The child does not need to watch the news and know the details of martial law.

With preschoolers, I would talk about the war in a milder, almost fairy-tale form: evil people want to take our cities from us, but our soldiers are defending us with all their might. Darling, we may even have to go for some time and we will not be able to take all your toys with us. But we will definitely be fine.

My youngest daughter is 8 years old. On the first day of the war, I told her calmly and without emotion — dear, the war has begun. The Russian army has attacked our country, but our Ukrainian army is defending us. A difficult period awaits us for some time, but this period will definitely end and everything will be fine. Dad and I will take care of you. The whole world now supports our country and helps us.

As a rule, the child perceives any situation with the same emotions as the parents at this time.

It is very important that the child retains the full range of emotions, including joy. It is important that the child continues to play, fantasize, make up stories. Now is not the time to severely limit gadgets. They can and need to play computer games, watch cartoons, communicate with friends who are in other cities.

Now it’s time to enable everything that does not threaten the child’s life.

It is also important for a child to sculpt and paint a lot. No brush? Even better, let children use their fingers. You can fold the sheets of paper together with the child and tear them into small pieces. All these simple activities help the child to relieve stress.

Focus on the body is also vital. For example, every morning, afternoon, and evening, do the following exercises: stroke your daughter’s or son’s hands and say, “Good morning, hands”, pat shoulders, and say, “Good morning, shoulders”. And so on, fingers, cheeks, ears, back, eyes, legs.

If the child has stopped talking, or seems “frozen” in one emotion, if sculpting and drawing can not return the child to normal routine (playing, indulging, rejoicing, fussing), then you should consult a specialist.

I understand how difficult these times are for every mother now and I share with each of you the incredible severity of the current situation. It is important to understand that ANY WAR ENDS! And every mother now “holds” the future of our country — our children.

Limit yourself from the news, switch your attention to anything but information about the war. Any actions that you can do as you would do in “normal times”, continue doing them on schedule.

The eyes of your children are now watching you intently and forming an idea of ​​the world through you. May there be a place for Trust, Love, Hope and Joy in what you broadcast to your children.

I’m with you!

Psychologist, certified psychotherapist in the method of positive psychotherapy, coach,
Julia Ladik